Thursday, September 21, 2006

THINGS I DID TODAY.

By Mondale, age 33 and a half.

Hey, I think I made it to older than Jesus. That's fairly cool eh?

Confiscated some NBAHoops cards from the two kids who keep playing with them in class.

Discovered that any future offspring will get INSTANT UK citizenship (Thank you, British Nationality Act 1981!- Hey, who would have thought the Tories would ever do me any favours?)

Stole food from a dear co worker. That doesn't look good but she was upset and I was trying to help. I ended up with 4 garlic doughballs. NIce.

Inserted a shopping bag into a small Volvic bottle. When another co-worker questioned the logic of this I did it again. TWO shopping bags into a small Volvic bottle. (Dear Guinness Book of Records, Is this a record?) That will show you.

I did that because I was trying to distract dear co worker from her own upset. Think of it, if you will, like a very small magic show in the faculty room. I didn't announce it as such because that would have been 'showy' but those who saw it knew what it was. I'm not sure I helped but the thought was there.

Became very bored, very quickly. I had to wait for an evening function at school. I decided to remain at my post and eat the free pizza that they provide for the losers who choose not to go home between the end of school and the evening function. That'll be me then.

I tried to stretch my legs and buy a cup of tea and a scone from the Trendy Loungery on Union st. This was a bad idea.
I had to fight, no, really, FIGHT my way past twenty or thirty moms with strollers and babies. There were no decent baked poroducts left and I just couldn't stand it.
I had to retreat to the expensive deli/market on the corner and buy a coffee and some chocolate bread just to stay awake.

I'm awake now.

Still several hours to go before I meet the parents of 2006/07.

I've scattered books around the room top make the place look 'learned'.

I've tidied Lego.

I've thought about tidying my desk but refuse.
My desk could be so much worse.
It's got a good 'slightly dotty teacher' look about it and a cool ornament that tell the temperature, air pressure and humidity.

I'm sure I'll blog more in a bit.

5 comments:

Listmaker said...

only in your mind does this make sense

"Stole food from a dear co worker. That doesn't look good but she was upset and I was trying to help."

i'm not saying that it didn't work, i wasn't there but wow. next time someone is upset i think i might steal their ipod or something. that will make them feel better.

and for the record, when you did the whole stuffing a plastic bottle routine, i was in the midst of a conversation with people at the table that also involved the co-worker who had her food stolen by you. as i said then, 90 seconds w/o the spotlight on you was more than you could bear.

we all love you very much.

Mondale said...

Yeah, but you know what I mean. It was sensational improv at the time. And I really, almost think it might have all helped. But actually I'll probably never know.

Mondale said...

Also, I would stick to food theft. If someone is upset stealing their electrical goods is going to make them way crazy.

Anonymous said...

I like when you write like this

ms.bri said...

I just don't even know what to say.