evolution

Take a close look at this kid's homework.

America!

My new topic at school is 'America'

I've twisted the curriculum around a bit to focus on the earliest Americans and then the Civil War. After half term the kids will be able to choose any American theme to study as a mini topic.

I began the topic by asking the class to note down what they knew about America.

Canadians do not like being confused with Americans.
9/11
President Obama.
They don't have a Queen.
Statue of Liberty.
Civil rights movement.
Grand Canyon.
Big portions.
Las vegas.
They were the only country to drop an atomic bomb.
Baseball and other strange sports.
War of Independence.
The stars and stripes.
There is a town called Springfield.
Vietnam beat them in a war.
A big army but not that good at winning against small countries.
They were involved in D Day.
Cowboys.

School Christmas fair.

This afternoon I witnessed a genius at work.

The child in question created a 'must have' buzz around an idea, a thing that could not be held or touched, taken away or even seen.

Other children paid good money to stick their hands inside 'Tommy's box of horror'. They rummaged inside the box, went 'oooh' and left, happy.

Only one child asked "what's the point? Is there a prize?"

And Tommy?

He spent the whole time walking around the fair eating cake with a 4 foot toy snake wrapped around his neck whilst a couple of girls ran his stall.

HARVEST rhymes with ...

So, it's the harvest festival in the parish church, all are gathered, the children, the parents, the elderly, some rioting toddlers.
Class 3 do a thing with the letters H.A.R.V.E.S.T
I wasn't paying as much attention as I should have but it seemed to be something about different words you can make out of H.A.R.V.E.S.T such as S.H.A.R.E. and R.E.S.T. and H.A.V.E and they relayed a meaningful homily after each new word. Was it me or as they changed the order of the letters during their thought provoking activity did I notice the word A.R.S.E

You couldn't make this stuff up.

Conflict resolution

Paddy's a kid in my class.
We disagree about chocolate bars.
He loves Mars bars.
I love Snickers.
He wants to settle this.
Once and for all.
I've offered him a debate, a vote, some fisticuffs.
I've even told him that my people could talk to his people, that he and I could remain civil.
He told me "You haven't got any people".
I told him "Yes I have".
He said "No you haven't"

This went on for a while.

I told him that I would vow to destroy him and everything he stood for.
He told me he didn't really understand the last bit but was ready to take me on, he told me that he had 'forces'.

I asked him what he meant by 'forces'.

He told me that if he explained what he meant by 'forces' he might as well just tell me to my face exactly what he planned to do to me and where and when so what's the point of trying to maintain any kind of element of surprise? After all, the element of surprise is key.

I asked if he could just possibly give me a timeframe, is this going to happen next week? Or do I have to wait years for the hiding at the hands of his 'forces'?

He said I should be careful on Tuesday.